What is a Nice Person?

We all know “who” a nice person may be – a good friend, an agreeable salesperson or co-worker. I’m wondering how you define what it takes to be a nice person. I’m wondering because I’ve met so many over the years and have heard even more people define themselves as being “good people” with very little basis for that claim, in my view. So….perhaps I have it wrong?

Having just spent seven nights in St. Maarten/St. Martin (Caribbean island named in Dutch and French and divided as such), I have to say that it would be hard to be nicer than the average resident of that magnificent island. It was just so easy to be there. Nobody harangued me about anything from what I can recall. The roadways were an indelible example of the islanders’ amiable dispositions. There is no way you could put a two lane road through the average US city, have no traffic lights, and move thousands of cars through it without having feuds and traffic jams. I know the literature said traffic can be bad, but believe me – it was a breeze. Why? Largely because they let drivers merge. People don’t squeeze up to the bumper of the car ahead of them in an aggressive act to keep merging traffic out. They sincerely hold the belief, “there, but for the grace of go I” and yield the 20 or 30 feet you need to get your car in line. Hence, while the traffic isn’t flying when the roads are full, it moves along surprisingly well. There are smiles and waves and brother and sisterhood on the roadways, not anger, rage and general cantankerousness.

I’ll tell you what, that sets the tone for the entire attitude on St. Maarten (or maybe it’s the reverse?). It’s the kind of thing that makes you want to participate with the community, not hide away in an American enclave (in my case, being a Yank) in some overpriced and “feels just like home” resort. Why visit another country if you aren’t going to invest some time in learning the culture and customs and becoming a friend?

For me, being a nice person has something to do with listening and having a sincere interest in those around you, including their opinions, religions, politics, culture, food, dance, music – and the foundation from which it all springs. Not all at once, of course! Certainly, the least we could do is wave another car in to the queue and move us all forward in a more timely and pleasant manner.

What’s more important: Being ahead of the adjacent car or arriving home with a stress-free smile?

Good then.